Saturday, March 16, 2013

Goal #2253: See if There is a Book so Awful That I Can't Finish Reading it

Originally, I thought this goal was going to be accomplished by reading a book that was written so poorly that it would be too laborous and painful to read. I have read many books and only a few of them were so badly written that I couldn't finish them. Some were so self-serving that I knew the only intent the author had in writing the book was to brag about how awesome he is. Others were so poorly researched that it was embarrassing to think someone would write and publish such trash. Some quickly established the fact that the author had no clue what he was talking about.
But there is one book that I will always remember as the absolutely most horrifying book I ever tried to read. I will not give the title of the book because I want no part in getting anyone else to read such a horrible book as this one. It was written by an author who interviewed men who had served as guards in German Nazi concentration camps throughout Europe during WWII. He wanted to get a picture of what happened at these camps from their perspective of the men who served as guards.
What I read in this book was some of the most horrid and gruesome accounts of man’s inhumanity to man I have ever encountered. In some macabre way, I was fascinated to read how these men justified what they were doing. Many actually believed that Jews were a subhuman species and needed to be destroyed so as not to pollute the superior human race. Others went mad because of their involvement in carrying out such inhuman orders given them by their "superiors." Some took such great joy and delight in displaying their brutality. This book gave me an insight into the tortured minds of men who knew they were doing the most awful things they could possibly do to other people.
I read about a third of the book and finally had to stop because it was simply so awful. I was literally getting sick to my stomach. Months later when the trauma wore off I picked up the book to see if I could finish it. After only a chapter or two I had to quite again. This continued until I got about two thirds of the way through the book. I finally had to just throw it away. I was so disturbed by what I was reading that I tore the book to pieces and burned it so that no one else would get hold of this book.
Now, you have to understand that I am a bibliophile and I don’t destroy books. And I NEVER burn them!! But I did NOT want anyone else to read this mind numbing book. I felt I would be doing something morally wrong by donating this book to any place that would make it possible for others to read it. It was an amazingly powerful book; powerful in a tortured terrible way.

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